constructing reality

.ivars gravlejs.

2009-08-21T19:40:00.002+08:00

interesting artist who showed visitors to art openings porn in his hp: http://www.ivarsgravlejs.com/pages/mobilevideo.htm

.moving house!!.

2009-08-17T00:31:00.005+08:00

to: bedtimeeyes.wordpress.comthis blog will be used for taking note of vid clips/pix i like. :)

.dad caught a centipede today.

2009-07-29T21:38:00.000+08:00

.nick vujicic.

2009-07-25T03:23:00.001+08:00

.olafur eliasson.

2009-07-21T00:50:00.001+08:00

.just be.

2009-07-09T21:29:00.005+08:00

pressuring others to deviate can be as disrespectful as pressuring them to conform.

.a happy woman.

2009-07-08T00:02:00.002+08:00

.daniel libeskind.

2009-07-06T00:03:00.001+08:00

.wii at yin's.

2009-06-21T01:53:00.002+08:00

in that room, we are the secret police caught in a crossfire with terrorists in an airplane, rescuing hostages and dodging bullets.with the remote controls,we are sonic, shadow, tails and knuckles competing in the beijing olympics, throwing the javelin and jumping on the trampoline.after pressing a few buttons,we are rabbits on the podium, dancing to hip hop and then, disco.for a while,we are not

.felix dennis.

2009-06-09T00:44:00.001+08:00

.poems.

2009-06-05T00:48:00.002+08:00

A Poem [Nichita Stanescu]Tell me, if I caught you one dayand kissed the sole of your foot,wouldn't you limp a little then,afraid to crush my kiss?(from indrani)Absolutely Last Poem to a Past Love [Agnes Meadows]In Winter's cloudburstWe dodged raindropsLike we dodged love.So I found another umbrellaUnder which to splashsinging, Gene Kelly style.Now even the rain feels warm.(from a link aik wee

.fr yj's blog.

2009-06-01T00:24:00.001+08:00

"If only I live in a world where people are more concerned with filling their minds than emptying their wallets."

.rooftop night.

2009-05-27T02:11:00.000+08:00

.wild is the wind in the sea of love.

2009-05-09T02:41:00.002+08:00

benjamin button

2009-05-08T17:29:00.002+08:00

"For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people

synthesizer

2009-05-04T00:55:00.001+08:00

this is awesome!http://lab.andre-michelle.com/tonematrix

.ryanair.

2009-04-11T22:07:00.002+08:00

http://www.b3ta.com/board/9222744http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/7914542.stm

.got this in my mailbox today.

2009-04-08T22:08:00.004+08:00

"Being an ideal Singaporean is hard. Singaporeans are implicated, on one side, by the state’s aggressive goals for national development, which demand from them ever-increasing productivity in full-time and formal employment and which require these in return for access to social goods.1 From the opposite direction, they are compelled through policies—which again involve social goods—to aspire to

.balzac and the little chinese seamstress.

2009-04-05T19:37:00.014+08:00

It isn't an everyday affair that a book affects you. A good book keeps your mind in sweet captivity, cajoling it to go on a wild flying carpet ride in an imagined world. Then, like a voyeur, you swiftly rub shoulders with familiar people you would never meet, and experience the emotions they might have felt. All these, right in your very own bedroom, and on your very own bed.Dai Sijie's Balzac

.she.

2009-04-02T15:56:00.006+08:00

She runs around, looking for the answer,But the question, it hasn’t arrived.

.leftover time.

2009-03-08T13:40:00.008+08:00

It is when, stripped of the external constraints you are under, and free from all the people you have to meet, that you realize how rich - or empty - your inner life is.

.hello from tomorrow.

2009-03-06T00:20:00.004+08:00

As the moonlight settles on my window sills, I wonder how you are.You, who are continents away, where it is still day.Hello.

.yann tiersen, amelie.

2009-02-22T22:37:00.017+08:00

The first notes set in bravely, drawn out of nimble fingers dancing on the piano. Minor chords form, hanging in the air and cascading to the 4/4 beat.“The body is more trouble than it is worth.” I once told yj. The statement was muttered in reference to life-threatening ailments and near-deaths.The sounds huddle close, flowing to create a melancholy melody that grows intense. Slowly, it

.junk.

2009-02-20T01:24:00.006+08:00

I always thought certain histories, or memories, should be treated as if they were junk. Put them aside, throw them out, and then, bury them inside. Bury them long enough for them to decompose and disappear. And then find the strength, please, to walk away.Occasionally, when my resolve weakens, I return to their burial ground. I would uncover the earth, just to find that much have changed, yet

.the devil is in the details.

2009-01-29T01:18:00.007+08:00

1. today.|..................,.................||.......,......................,.....||....................................||..............................,.....|2. last year dec, tiong bahru plaza.|| || || ||

.hope and sunscreen.

2009-01-27T23:57:00.003+08:00

The first, of Joven, taken outside my uncle's flat. The second, at my ah ma's place.I love the study room at my uncle's. Light, big sofa, purple walls and pretty shadows. No doors. I want!me: "I love this room!" uncle: "Yes, it's a cruising room."me: "It's for cruising?!"uncle: "Ya, cruising."me: [laughs] "Cruising!"uncle: "Er! I mean, cozy!"

.sentiments of a bicycle.

2009-01-27T01:30:00.006+08:00

.dancing leaves.

2009-01-27T01:28:00.007+08:00

the leaves dance gracefully, together with the sun.

.skies.

2009-01-22T00:27:00.005+08:00

When I see skies like these, I wish I have my Canon 450, instead of my Nokia N82.

.kissing angels on my kitchen floor.

2009-01-19T03:40:00.002+08:00

.baudelaire: a self-portrait, by lois boe hyslop and francis e.hyslop, jr..

2009-01-19T01:50:00.007+08:00

[p.15] "It was partly through leisure that I grew. To my great detriment, since leisure without fortune increases debts. But to my great profit so far as sensibility, meditation and the possibility of dandyism and dilettantism were concerned."[p.117] "Exiled on earth in the midst of jeers,His giant wings keep him from walking."[p.199] "One always imagines that there will be time,and then death,

.talking art over beer.

2009-01-15T02:45:00.012+08:00

prof: "The irony about art is that you can produce naively produce art if you don’t know about art history. If you know art history, you may never produce art. History becomes a burden." me: "Because you realize you can never create anything original. Someone else has already done it." prof: "Yes. But if you know art history, and yet can still create art, now, you’re

.about today.

2009-01-15T01:14:00.005+08:00

I love days like these. A little reading in school. Then an afternoon session of beers/fish and chips with my prof at Brewerkz, where topics such as Marx, money, art, things, people and living creatively popped up. Next up was dinner with yj and zl in a rooftop café at Holland Village, where conversations treaded on the terrain of office colleagues, unthinking behaviors,

.a pretty flower.

2009-01-09T22:54:00.004+08:00

.fallen leaves.

2009-01-07T03:18:00.005+08:00

.around my home.

2009-01-04T03:00:00.005+08:00

.emptiness.

2008-12-08T16:23:00.005+08:00

adam's curse

2008-11-16T23:25:00.004+08:00

We sat grown quiet at the name of love; We saw the last embers of daylight die, And in the trembling blue-green of the skyA moon, worn as if it had been a shellWashed by time's waters as they rose and fellAbout the stars and broke in days and years.I had a thought for no one's but your ears: That you were beautiful, and that I stroveTo love you in the old high way of love; That it had all seemed

reminiscence

2008-11-15T02:56:00.014+08:00

We all revisit chapters of our lives once in a while. Perhaps you too, like me, in one of those quiet nights, wonder about past lovers. How is he now? What is he busy with? Should I get in touch with him again? Or even, why the hell did I get involved with him in the first place?The night then turns into a haunting one, marked by ghosts of decisions you’ve made, words you’ve said and things you’

zouk

2008-11-09T12:40:00.006+08:00

The world spins as you spin, beginning its transformation into a cacophony of senseless colors and lights. You wonder at the bodies moving on the dance floor, the bodies emptying their glasses, and the bodies uncertain of what to do. The alcohol hits you harder. Harder, as time flees, slipping out of your grasp and like an old photograph, gets forgotten. Distinctions melt to the pounding music,

turn me on

2008-10-10T23:35:00.005+08:00

Photo credit: Sit Weng Sanweng san and i collaborated to make a lamp last week. it's on show at Objectifs (12A liang seah st) till oct 24. the work is called "turn me on."support if you're free!

...

2008-09-20T12:54:00.010+08:00

Is it too much to say I’m tired?I hate using the word tired, as much as I loathe the smell of hospitals. It has been used too often by alienated individuals who are sick of their work.First, there’s the cancer, next up is the blur vision problem that has not been resolved, then coming in the picture without any warning are the kidney stones. The kidney stones… That phrase has a rather rock and

Al-Ghoussein, Tarek Talat

2008-09-12T00:33:00.010+08:00

"Sit down. Or I'll turn violent," the 47 year old Palestinian artist-photographer Tarek insists."No, you won't." I laugh, and try to pay for his bill again."Yes, I will. Don't you know, my people are very violent. We beat up women." He jokes, a snide reference to the stereotypical image of an Arab the Western media often portrays. I sit down anyway, amused by this man who has said he can't do an

a bad mood and a good song.

2008-08-29T02:31:00.002+08:00

Get Drunk!

2008-08-21T02:38:00.003+08:00

Be drunk.That's it!The great imperative!In order not to feelTime's horrid fardelbruise your shoulders,grinding you into the earth,Get drunk and stay that way.On what?On wine, poetry, virtue, whatever.But get drunk.And if you sometimes happen to wake up on the porches of a palace,in the green grass of a ditch,in the dismal loneliness of your own room,your drunkenness gone or disappearing,ask the

waiting

2008-08-20T01:49:00.010+08:00

My classmate and I were walking along the corridor after class ended, when he said he wanted to base his research on people waiting at bus stops. I nodded, intrigued, chatted a little, but could not say anything smarter than, “That’s interesting.”It was only a few minutes after we parted ways, and as an afterthought, that I realized how significant waiting is.Waiting, I think, is doing nothing

a poem I found while sorting my emails

2008-08-19T18:08:00.005+08:00

Suddenly I desire to be an empty houseIn an isolated village.It should be bare and empty.But pleasant,With a fragrance long preserved,And waiting for someone to move in.An empty houseAs clean and tide as it might be,Yet open and simple,From whence I can see the sky and the stars.SomedayIts master will open the door and enter,Softly saying, with a smile, “Oh I really like it.”It is clean and

"when my little brother calls..."

2008-08-17T14:50:00.001+08:00

lovers in the sky (viewed from a car).

2008-08-17T13:26:00.004+08:00

16th Aug.

2008-08-17T13:23:00.001+08:00

Herbert Marcuse, One Dimensional Man

2008-08-09T22:26:00.020+08:00

"The distinguishing feature of advanced industrial society is its effective suffocation of those needs which demand liberation - liberation also from that which is tolerable and rewarding and comfortable - while it sustains and absolves the destructive power and repressive function of the affluent society. Here, the social controls exact the overwhelming need for the production and consumption of

A morning chat

2008-07-27T23:55:00.004+08:00

We stand at the corridor, looking at the narrow street below, with cups of warm coffee in our hands. My bags lie largely ignored at the reception counter. “The reflection of the sunrise on the van is beautiful. The colors.” I comment, knowing that you’re a dreamer as well, and that you will not think this statement odd.You nod, and tell me about the place located in South Spain that you and

angel in barcelona

2008-07-22T09:30:00.003+08:00

*dreams of pimentos, clara (beer plus lemonade) and cava*

people

2008-07-22T09:00:00.011+08:00

I am thinking of…the two cute Spanish guys I bought ice cream from.the teenager at the metro who passed me by and, for no apparent reason, whispered in my ear, “Go to hell.”the theives who took my keys, opened my locker and stole my belongings while I was asleep.the police officer who explained his calendar to me, and who smiled when I said the stuff I’ve lost is worth more than my bank

all boxed up

2008-07-15T18:04:00.002+08:00

I guess to be able to think out of the box, you've to be able to see the box first.I'm trying to see the box i've grown up in.

red: color of love

2008-07-08T21:05:00.005+08:00

The red button meets the red fingernail. "You look familiar," they both say."Will you stay?" The red button, sewn to the cloth, and hence, unable to move, asks."I cant," the fingernail says.

lovely shakes

2008-07-06T17:12:00.009+08:00

The gorgeous people who willingly shake their heads at me, and for me. ;) Thank you.

ah ma

2008-07-06T01:28:00.005+08:00

Taking photos of my relatives today was fun.I think she's beautiful.

free

2008-06-30T13:25:00.001+08:00

The bird has its eyes to the sky, wanting to be free and live, like other birds soaring past. But its body is too rigid, and the burden tied to its legs, too heavy. And so it spreads its wings wide, hoping to kiss the white clouds, but stays unmoving, forever still.

a stranger

2008-06-29T16:24:00.005+08:00

You sit on the floor, with your hands resting on the bench, wearing a royal blue, velvetly jacket with a ridiculous amount of lace at its collar and sleeves. There's something about you that I can't pinpoint."What's your name?" I ask. You reply, looking back calmly, your eyes betraying intelligence. That gaze. Alert, self-assured and a little guarded, imbued with a sense of danger that only a

match-making

2008-06-27T04:41:00.000+08:00

starts and loose ends

2008-06-23T16:43:00.008+08:00

I've started exercising. Swam with Justin and JH last week and I'm hoping it's a start to exercising weekly - or okay - bi-weekly, depending on how lazy I feel. CC, Woon Woon and I are thinking of wakeboarding or something. That'll be fun.Just fed my nygh and hcjc notes to the recycle bin. Mitosis, quantum physics and weird-looking mathematical formulas - things I can't recall anything about. But

back alleys

2008-06-19T02:30:00.020+08:00

The chairs sit at the back alleys, kept out of sight from the busy main streets. Here, they contemplate, braving both the sun and the rain that leave traces of aging on their bodies. Sometimes, they stand a metre, two, or more apart. And sometimes, they are only separated by a few centimetres. Yet, each is never close enough to touch another, and never, close enough to share the very same sun

on love

2008-06-11T01:22:00.004+08:00

The cigarette smoke seeks air's embrace, and rushing into it, meets its death.

Facebook musings

2008-06-04T04:52:00.009+08:00

Updating profiles, uploading photographs and videos, playing games, commenting on (almost) everything and scrawling inane messages on friends' walls. These are just some activities marking another unremarkable day in the Facebook world. Facebook is - according to its inventors - a "social utility that connects people." And connect people it does, for it even has a live feed informing you on

last day in london

2008-05-29T16:34:00.003+08:00

concentration camp

2008-05-26T04:52:00.005+08:00

The air is dry. The only light is at the end of the long corridor. Flowers lie on the floors of individual cells in this empty prison barrack. Some seem to have been carelessly scattered, and others, merticulously placed. But they are all fake, plastic and very dead. Tales of torture during WWII in this Sachsenhausen concentration camp flood through the grey, ugly audio guide hung around my neck.

go on, shout

2008-05-21T05:52:00.006+08:00

Sometimes i feel like i am stuck in the pages of a trashy lifestyle magazine. everyone is shouting to be heard but noone - including myself - is saying anything extremely interesting.

that empty feeling

2008-05-08T00:10:00.003+08:00

life is meaningless. you give it meaning.and sleeping feels so good sometimes that i wish i'm awake to enjoy it.

andreas slominski

2008-05-01T00:16:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, bits and pieces of conversations or events come together after the moments are gone, only making (more) sense with hindsight.I was writing an essay a few weeks ago about Foucault and Habermas when I decided to use an art work by Slominski to illustrate one of my points. Basically, the work is called Streetlight with Tyre (1996) and consisted of a bicycle-tyre laid around the base of a

the ant

2008-04-22T21:27:00.001+08:00

The ant crawls onto my hand. I watch it curiously, distracted by this sudden intruder and enjoying the slightly ticklish sensation as it strolls across my skin. Walking to the back of my hand, the ant pauses.On a usual day, I would have flicked the ant away unthinkingly.Standing on its two hind legs, the ant stretches out its front legs and starts to clean itself, with its antenna waving in the

thank you

2008-04-21T00:58:00.011+08:00

Today, I received the biggest rose ever in my 26 years. It was a shock. Thank you, my sweet cousin. :) You've made my day. OK, damn, thank you for the photo of yourself as well.~~I like this photo of chaptain. One of the few ones in which he doesn't look melancholic. Maybe it's because he's eating here.~~Exams and essays always make me feel guilty. Many times, I'll skip meals and study/write till

being conscious

2008-04-14T06:06:00.006+08:00

Once in a while, you get those moments in which everything seems strange. And now, sitting at my messy workspace, with cds, books and papers strewn all over, a JVC radio at my side, an electric guitar on the floor and a small, dark-colored lizard in the kitchen, I feel that way.You feel... contingent, struck by a sudden realization of your own mortality, which is something you know all along but

wallpaper

2008-04-04T04:18:00.010+08:00

I should be taking part in a student photo exhibition. Will try to print my stuff and send it over soon.I'm just an amatuer, but if you wanna drop by Objectifs on April 17, 730pm, great. It's the opening. :)The show is till May 16.

night shift

2008-04-04T03:25:00.011+08:00

Just came back fr prata with angie. Awesome is that mini drum beat gadget she brought with her. Late night suppers, conversations, cruising and singing along (maybe horribly, but who cares) to the song set on play. I love moments like these. Jordin Sparks - TattooNo matter what you say about loveI keep coming back for moreKeep my hand in the fireSooner or later, I'll get what I'm asking for No

are you happy?

2008-03-25T02:19:00.008+08:00

Happiness is everywhere in a capitalist society. Well, almost anyway. Think advertisements. After all, the main emotion they are selling is happiness. It's an over-hyped emotion that has been packaged and flaunted in shopping centers, on the streets and in between your favorite TV programs.Perhaps, because happiness is advertised and shoved into our faces so much, we become sad. For every corner

pulling strings

2008-03-22T19:13:00.005+08:00

Must the show go on?There must be some mistakeI didnt mean to let them Take away my soul.Am I too old, is it too late?Where's the feeling gone?Will I remember the songs?The show must go onPink Floyd

thanks

2008-03-21T01:57:00.003+08:00

"I love you but I never thought of owning you."Of course, you have her. Funny how something - for the last three years - always end around my birthday."Thank you, but sorry who is this?"Maybe this is the decision.

darren's wedding - shopping w prof - mac party!

2008-03-15T23:55:00.008+08:00

split it 3 ways

2008-03-12T02:19:00.010+08:00

My heart wishes me to be a simple person with faith, and my mind tells me there's no valid reason to believe in religion, while my body ignores everything and goes about its bodily functions.So maybe my heart will go to heaven and sing Hallelujah with the angels, and my mind will get roasted by devils sporting little red horns in hell, while my body decomposes six feet under and befriends

words

2008-03-08T04:07:00.011+08:00

These days, I read everything except my readings. And write anything except academic essays. If this sounds familiar, perhaps you too, are well versed in the life of a professional student.Maybe you are also, like me, the kind of student who misses deadlines (or meets them just in time), take ages to read and understand a paper, think books make hard pillows, and is convinced that the library is

immobilised by two pins

2008-03-06T22:41:00.005+08:00

And I yelled - even before he inserted a needle into an acupuncture point near my ankle.My knees felt weak and my legs didn't feel like mine. I stayed still, at the mercy of two tiny pins, while recalling an earlier conversation with the doctor."Will it hurt?""No, it doesn't. You'll only scream, that's all."Now, consider that a prophecy came true.

turn me on

2008-03-05T02:06:00.003+08:00

my new bedroom lights, which look like candles in the sky!

state of mind

2008-03-04T15:43:00.006+08:00

Denial. It's an easy mode to live in. Like now, I'm thinking but only unrelated words come and then go, dissolving into incoherency and ambiguity. I'm missing people but I don't want to know who I'm missing, preferring to hide in a state somewhere between clarity and uncertainty, all the while getting by by believing it's the former and that it's all about control.Try to be cautious, and you slip

breakfast and arguments

2008-02-27T00:08:00.017+08:00

My dad prepares the same breakfast almost everyday. And he sure has a way to make me eat. Even though I protest all the time.That morning, I was adamant I would not stuff any of his cooking into my mouth."I don't want to eat."He kept quiet."I don't want to eat." I said again, louder this time. "Can't you give me a break?" I have to eat the same breakfast for nearly 365 days a year. Even civil

jack and jill went up the hill

2008-02-21T23:25:00.007+08:00

Here's an adaptation of the classic Jack and Jill that I found at Facebook:cute.

a sign in grad rm:

2008-02-20T01:04:00.002+08:00

2008-02-15T00:31:00.009+08:00

there's no present. because once you think/say it, it has already slipped into the past.there's no everyday. because its very definition presupposes a whole which can never be grasped - we can only perceive it in moments.taken this way, both the present and the everyday are illusionary concepts we live by, and perhaps, can't live without.------the "me" and the "i" - george herbert meadthe self is

2008-02-09T23:03:00.000+08:00

It's the lunar new year, and like every other year, it comes with the obligatory temple visits with relatives. Today, that ritual is reenacted at a temple at Boon Lay.Sitting on a wooden bench waiting, I wonder why people pray or burn joss sticks, papers etc. In that religious space, these objects embody prayers, thanks and hopes, setting themselves between the worldly and the divine.Pardon my

this time, this space

2008-02-09T03:51:00.000+08:00

and what are you doing, this very minute?

because then you.

2008-02-09T03:17:00.000+08:00

fall out of the system."don't sell your time to anyone"i m out of sorts in too many ways.a danger i can't resist.

almost open

2008-02-03T02:13:00.000+08:00

2008-01-30T03:11:00.000+08:00

I went to prof today, very frustrated.He's right. I can't hurry things, not when it comes to matters like that. There's no need to keep trying to cheer her up. Just let her speak her mind, and keep reassuring her. Talking and venting is better than bottling it up. Worrying about ironing clothes is better than worrying about the illness. And worrying is acknowledgement – it's better than laughing

2008-01-15T14:33:00.000+08:00

How should you react when a doctor tells you one of your close family members is carrying a time bomb in her body? In a more abstract sense, with life counting down to death, aren't we all?How do you detach yourself from yourself so that you can seem strong on the outside for someone else? And deal with the problem as rationally as possible?How do you swallow the lump in your throat when

nus

2008-01-10T21:37:00.000+08:00

I was waiting outside Prof Tong’s office when I saw this outside an empty office room. Objects placed by a graduate student on a low coffee table.Later, I realized, it’s been exactly one year since a teacher of mine passed away.... The room may be empty and your nametag may not be on its door, but you are still remembered.Thank you for your time, your approachable attitude and your smiles.

Musings on the extremely brand conscious

2008-01-05T00:01:00.000+08:00

The sad thing about wearing clothes or shoes with brand names or logos splashed all over is that you can’t help but feel like a goddamn walking advertisement.The funny thing about feeling that way is that you enjoy it.