free

The bird has its eyes to the sky, wanting to be free and live, like other birds soaring past. But its body is too rigid, and the burden tied to its legs, too heavy. And so it spreads its wings wide, hoping to kiss the white clouds, but stays unmoving, forever still.

a stranger

You sit on the floor, with your hands resting on the bench, wearing a royal blue, velvetly jacket with a ridiculous amount of lace at its collar and sleeves.

There's something about you that I can't pinpoint.

"What's your name?" I ask. You reply, looking back calmly, your eyes betraying intelligence. That gaze. Alert, self-assured and a little guarded, imbued with a sense of danger that only a non-conformist or a rebel possesses.

"And yours?" You hold out your hand.

"Huixian." I shake it, drawing back faster than I should, a little too aware of the clamminess of mine. Suddenly conscious of the cameras, lights and people around us, I get to what I'm supposed to do.

And the spell breaks.

That gaze.

match-making

starts and loose ends

I've started exercising. Swam with Justin and JH last week and I'm hoping it's a start to exercising weekly - or okay - bi-weekly, depending on how lazy I feel. CC, Woon Woon and I are thinking of wakeboarding or something. That'll be fun.

Just fed my nygh and hcjc notes to the recycle bin. Mitosis, quantum physics and weird-looking mathematical formulas - things I can't recall anything about. But the significance of these papers lies in the scribbles by my friends and I, the cartoons we drew (there's no stopping YJ when she's drawing her bball fairy everywhere), the tic-tac-toes, the cheesy chinese song lyrics and more... These'll have to stay in my memories. Too much nostalgia results in cockroach eggs and incessant nagging.

It occurs to me I can't get rid of all e clutter in my room and inside me at one go, but regular spring-cleaning may just give myself a little more space.

Prompted by a friend, I've joined this networking website called Tagged. Besides all the "hi" messages (including one by a bisexual female), I've got one asking if I'm interested to be a social escort. "Don't waste your youth," the sender says, "all the guys are screened carefully and are below 32." And to up the draw of her offer, she further assures me "looks doesn't matter." I'm not quite sure if that's an insult.

Oh, Zouk has renewed my membership, despite my not-very-impressive attendance. And I have a whole list of remote/new spots I want to check out. Drinks, perhaps?

back alleys

The chairs sit at the back alleys, kept out of sight from the busy main streets. Here, they contemplate, braving both the sun and the rain that leave traces of aging on their bodies. Sometimes, they stand a metre, two, or more apart. And sometimes, they are only separated by a few centimetres. Yet, each is never close enough to touch another, and never, close enough to share the very same sun rays and rain drops that pour down nonchalently. Differences in spatial location render the distance-in-between always existent, and futile attempts to communicate, always too apparent. In this situation, the chairs live on alone, and not alone.

on love

The cigarette smoke seeks air's embrace, and rushing into it, meets its death.

Facebook musings

Updating profiles, uploading photographs and videos, playing games, commenting on (almost) everything and scrawling inane messages on friends' walls. These are just some activities marking another unremarkable day in the Facebook world. Facebook is - according to its inventors - a "social utility that connects people." And connect people it does, for it even has a live feed informing you on what's happening with your friends and acquaintances. Information about people you know gets delivered straight to your computer screen in real time, or as soon as the relevant parties make a move in this virtual world anyway.

You know going-ons without asking. You stay connected with people without really being connected (unless you want to). You watch. You are being watched. You are entertained. You are also entertainment.

Interaction is mediated, and interaction - by requiring a password and a username - is also at your own convenience.